If anyone stumbles across this, I've started a new blog with a bit of a different angle.
Almonds to Zucchinis
Cheerio, then!
What's that? Day 2? Surely I'm on day 360-something? Well no, my ear was my undoing really. So much psychological crap stopping me from exercising, can't get any help for it because doctors have never heard of it, blah blah blah.
I still get down about it. But I finally braved the gym for the first time this year a couple of months ago. My ear didn't play up and I felt great. But then I started to get scared that it would happen the second time! So I didn't go again.
I've joined the 6 week Spring Into Action challenge over at We Are Slimming. I'll be very happy just to complete the damn thing, as I've never managed to complete any kind of finite challenge before. Not even my 13 week one last year (and I got so close too! :( )
Off to a good start, I've gotten up at 5:30 the last two mornings to do 20 mins on the exercise bike, then have done more after work. Tomorrow I have to go to the hairdresser, Thursday the waxer and then Friday we're driving up to Wodonga for my cousin's wedding on Saturday. I plan to fully enjoy myself and not worry too much while I'm up there but next week I'll be back into the gym.
I think I might have developed exercise-induced asthma though. It started when I was doing C25K last year - and was why I stopped actually. As soon as I'd start running my throat would close up and I'd start wheezing. It got really scary one day when I was a couple of kms away from home, and had to walk all the way back and it didn't stop the whole way - until I got home and had some of Bass Boy's ventolin. Anyway it seems worse, I'm getting wheezy on the bike and on the tready just walking with an incline. Better get to the doctor quick smart. I've never had anything like this before!
I spent the last couple of months on Lite N Easy which was a complete waste of money - I think I actually gained weight. I was on the 1500 calorie menu - but only lunches and dinners - and I was just hungry all the time. And something about it just made me crave sweet stuff... I think I ate more chocolate on that than I ever have! Plus I never want to look at a microwave meal again!
Anyway last night I cooked a meal for the first time in, well, months! It was awesome, just chicken and veg with a bit of gravy. So good. Chicken Cacciatore is on the menu tonight. Steak & veg tomorrow and a spinach and ham frittata on Thursday. Then we'll have the leftover in sandwiches on the way to wodonga - no need to stop at that newish giant fast food place - it seriously have every fast food you can think of.
Oh, better put in my starting stuff..
Weight: 87.0kg
Bust: 100cm
Waist: 82.5cm
Hips: 106.5cm
Arm: 33.5
Neck: 32cm
Shoulder: 103cm
Thigh: 68cm
Calf: 43cm
All those numbers look wayyyy too familiar! My bust has never been that big though! My period is about to come so maybe that's why. I've never seen that measurement over 97cm.
Anyway I totally busted my index finger today typing in endless numbers and it's really hurting to type! Geez does that warrant a sicky tomorrow? ;)
I'm on a soft food diet for my TMJ. All I can think of is:
- eggs
- soup
- yoghurt
- cottage cheese
- porridge
- soft fruits (pureed apple, canned peaches, bananas etc)
- coffee ;)
Make it. Now.
The calories might be low but at least it's better than how I've been eating lately. Ugh.
I'm seeing a Bowen therapist for my TMJ. And I'm starting meditation for stress relief. Although a new job would probably do the trick there.
I am hoping that fixing TMJ will help with my ear as they appear to be linked. Oh, and I'm only allowed to walk for the few days after Bowen treatments. Again, probably better than what I've been doing lately (that would be nothing).
I don't want to go back and read it but if I recall correctly, my last post was full of whinging and self-pity. My apologies!
I've finally stopped eating shit and started exercising again! Well I'm starting off very slow, because I do not want to go all hardcore for a week and then drop off again. My ear is still giving me the absolute shits, but I've found that the stationary bike doesn't usually trigger it, so I've been using that and walking on the treadmill. My goal is to do that 4 times this week (done 2 so far). I'm just going to stick to stuff at home for now, so that if the ear does go, I can just lie down straight away (the quickest remedy).
There's evidence to suggest that a Patulous Eustachian Tube is related to TMJ issues, which I have. I know I clench my teeth a lot, especially when I'm stressed (and my ear gets worse during times of stress) but my dentist said my teeth are worn down from grinding, which I didn't know I did. This morning I got myself a little nightguard thing which is supposed to stop me from grinding/clenching in my sleep. I hope this will help with my TMJ symptoms (sore jaw, headaches, dizziness, earaches) AND I hope that it will help just a little with my ear. Sigh.
Anyway my weight is somewhere around the 85kg mark at the moment...it may have almost hit 89 not too long ago though. So now I'm around 4kgs off what I was pre-NZ freakout.
I'd like to drop 20kgs before the wedding - that's doable, I've got til March 27th next year!
Thinking about Vietnam/Laos/Thailand for the honeymoon... I think I'm more excited about planning that, than planning the wedding :D
I'm going to try using this thing a bit more. I get so self-conscious about blogging though!
Hi folks (if there's any folks out there...helloooo?)
So things haven't been great for the last couple of months. My ear seems to be a constant bother now, rather than an intermittent thing. I haven't been to the gym for months. I had a few good days over Christmas and attempted to go for a bike ride - half way up the second hill (maybe 10 mins in) along came the autophony - I had to walk my bike home while sobbing hysterically. I must've looked like a little girl who'd just had her lunch money stolen.
I've done a little bit of walking lately, but the other day I let the dog off the leash and ran around with her for a couple of minutes - autophony. Tears.
I've been seeing a chiropractor - and after the first adjustment all my symptoms disappeared! I was so happy. But they all came back within a week.
I've been having a bout of vertigo for the last week or so too which has brought up the possibility of my condition maybe being Superior Canal Dishiscence Syndrome. That's where there's a tiny gap in the bone above the semi-circular canal in the inner ear. The good news is, that with a high resolution cat scan of the temporal bone, it can be detected (and thus definitively diagnosed, unlike PET). There's then an option of cranial surgery which has a high success rate.
So, scary brain surgery aside, I really hope that's what it is. I have doubts though - sadly I think that I do have PET, and my balance problems are a separate issue.
My chiropractor wants to treat me over four weeks and if there's been no improvement he has a GP to send me to who he assures will actually listen.
It's just that hardly anyone seems to have heard of either condition (SCDS was only discovered in 1998) and people just think I'm crazy.
This problem is ruining my life. I've been depressed almost to the point of feeling suicidal over the last few weeks.
In weight-related news, I'm up about 4kgs from my pre-NZ weight. Healthy eating and exercise go hand in hand for me so if I can't exercise I find it so much more difficult to eat well. Depression doesn't help.
Thank you for your engagement congratulations, I'm starting to get excited about the whole wedding thing, although I keep worrying about my ear on the actual day. We are looking at getting married next year, I like the last weekend of March but I suppose that will depend on the availability of whatever venue we decide on.
We're inspecting Montsalvat in Eltham on the weekend and Melbourne Zoo next weekend. I have fallen in love with Montsalvat from photos, plus the interiors are beautiful so weather becomes less important (actually I think a dark day would really suit the place!). It's expensive though. It's hard to know what our budget is because my parents haven't yet said how much they're willing to contribute.
I always wanted to get married up in the Dandenongs but since actually looking at the places, they all just look the same to me. Wedding machines - the same wedding week in week out, spitting them out over and over. I do not want to be a cog in a wedding machine!
I'm going to be starting study soon, in IT. I have a secret ambition of becoming a nutritionist or dietician but simply can't afford to study full-time so I don't know how I will ever realise this!
He proposed in the snow at the top of Fox Glacier when we flew up there in a helicopter. It was perfect! I'm very happy. :)
Oh, and after all my pre-trip stress-eating and my during-trip delicious NZ food eating and beer drinking I'm up about 3kgs. Nothing really, I reckon a week of eating well will take a fair chunk off that. Geez, will have to get serious now, I do NOT want to be one of those brides who freaks out 4 weeks before the wedding and goes on a starvation diet!
(I reckon I've got about 18 months to get sorted, anyhow)
I know I've been slack but I don't really care.
I go away on Monday and my ear has been fucked for weeks. I just keep hoping it's sticking around because of pre-holiday stress (stress makes it worse) and that it will go away once I get there. I am so scared that it's just going to ruin my holiday. I'm PMSy too and I can't stop crying because I'm so fucking sick of it.
Exercise makes it worse so I haven't done any. Just been stress-eating.
I hate this so much. It's ruining my life.
Oops! Damn, I was so dedicated to this blogging thing back at the start! There's been too much going on I suppose.
Had a 200g gain on Saturday, weighed in at 83.0. I was disappointed but it was my own fault as I had been pretty complacent during the week.
This week has been much better and despite another weekend full of crap food I checked this morning and was down 700g to 82.3. That's the lowest weight so far! I even ate MACCAS on the weekend!
18 sleeps til NZ - I don't think I'll crack the 70s but in a way I'm kind of glad because I know I'm bound to put on a bit of weight while I'm away and I think it would be a bit depressing to get into the 70s only to jump back out straight after. When I return I will piss the 80s off for good though, that's for sure.
I'm feeling pretty good regardless - most of my clothes are fitting me now, and these are clothes that I bought when I was between 75-80kgs so I must have a fair bit more muscle now. I feel pretty cute when I look in the mirror instead of feeling disgusted by my reflection. I feel fit and strong.
So in other news, Bass Boy has been acting a little strange lately. He had to refinance his car loan for our trip - just a bit of bad luck really. Anyway he won't tell me how much he took out which is unusual in our relationship as we're very open with that kind of stuff. He's changed his email password (again, I've always had access - I book things in his name and then go and get out the confirmation emails etc). Last night I used his laptop and his history was full of jeweler's websites!!! I don't want to get my hopes up or anything but marriage is definitely something we've talked about and I feel ready to go there and I think a New Zealand proposal would just be the most romantic and awesomest thing ever. My very inquisitive nature makes me want to snoop further but that would just be silly, wouldn't it!
I have become such a slack blogger! It was inevitable I suppose. ;)
Had a 100g loss on Saturday, but was expecting a gain so wasn't complaining. Ate too much crap on the weekend again! Argh! Must stop that.
I bought some new dresses yesterday, one is a bit too tight but it is the hottest dress I've ever owned so I feel very inspired for it to fit properly! It makes my waist look real little and makes me feel kinda 50s pinup girly. It's a black & white polka dot thing. Hott.
I swear my biggest problem with losing weight is that I start enjoying clothes shopping wayyy too much! haha
Got a really bad stomachache at about lunchtime today. I sat it out for an hour and then left work early, doubled over in pain. Came home took some buscopan and fell asleep for 3 hours. I really want this week to be spot on and was thinking my tummy had stuffed Monday! But I was feeling better after a while so I got on the tready and ran for 20 mins (it's getting easier!) and made dinner. So today has ended up being spot on - woohoo!
It's my cousin's engagement this weekend so I will be avoiding any stomach-bloating carby things.
Oh - and I've had 4 people comment on my shrinking! It makes me feel a little uncomfortable but good at the same time.
Well, my weigh-in on Saturday was 82.9 - 1.1kg loss! I wrote up a whole post on the day and then got distracted, and then Bass Boy used my computer to check his bank balance and then closed Firefox on me! I cracked it - I never close Firefox, just shut down leaving it open so I can always restore the session - I'm always clicking links in blogs and such but might not get to reading them for a few days you see.
I ate a whole heap of crap over the weekend so that was pretty stupid. I've been struggling on weekends lately. This week is going to be a bit strange because I'm staying in a hotel in the city for 2 nights - Bass Boy has a work conference and they're putting him up in a 5 star hotel! Sweet! So I don't really know how I'm going to sort out meals yet.
I've discovered that I'm most likely to take a day off exercise on Monday - but then almost as likely to also take one off on Sunday. So I really need to make sure I do it on Monday so I can take Sunday off guilt-free. Yesterday I got home, took the dog for an hour-long walk, then got on the tready for C25k (10/3/10mins). It was bin night so I changed the kitty litter and was going to go visit my folks - figuring Bass Boy could help with the rest of the rubbish later. Then I thought I could just pick up the rubbish in the lounge room (including bits of dog toy scattered everywhere). It turned into a full-on cleaning frenzy which hasn't happened in my house for a long, long time.
I feel so much better now that the house is clean! Well, the most lived in parts at least.
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